Hello,  PILLOW HUMPERS!!  Today is your lucky day!  Logan is going to get you “layed?. Okay, now, calm down!!!.  I don’t want you blowing your load from thinking about getting pussy and you are going to want to keep your head clear!!

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Okay, you jerk off junkie, go ahead.  You have three minutes to tug your hard on.  Get it out of your system, you will need to keep your head pretty clear.  There is a lot of construction to be done.  What?  You didn’t think I was actually going to get you a pussy from a real woman did you?  Sorry, my little two pump chump, I was just thinking you were maybe getting a little bored of your fist. So, its time  for a new jerking device!!   You are going to be fucking a potato chip can.  Get it?  You are going to get “layed?! **giggle**
You are much better staying home grabbing your new homemade toy and paying for phone sex, you little Jerk Off Junkie.  First you will need to do some shopping.  Here is your list:

  • an empty potato chip can
  • a piece of 9″x9″x1″ foam rubber
  • a condom
  • a 1 1/4″ o-ring
  • a pair of scissors
  • a marker or two
  • First,  lay out the foam and trim it to the size of the can.  Now unroll the condom and drop in the o-ring.  Lay the condom on the foam with the opening just over the edge. Make a mark where the ring sits and cut the foam into two pieces along this line.  Roll up the smaller piece of foam and put it in the can.  Roll up the condom in the larger piece of foam, making sure the ring is flat against one end of the foam roll, and the top of the condom is sticking out of the center of the other end.  Using your scissors, nip the tip of the condom, stick the foam into your new toy and keep about a half an inch outside of the container. Poke a small hole on the side, near the bottom of your new girlfriend and use a pink marker to draw a pair of lips on the center roll.  Pull the condom over the rim of the chip can and viola!  Its time to get “layed?!

    Now click the button, Jerk Off Junkie, and call me!

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    1-800-863-5478 extension 02869579